Leony.net Blog

Hello 2013

Hello 2013

Can’t believe this is my first entry in 2013. I have been away for a while and my life has changed so much. I am now a full time single mother. I love being a mother but I hate being a widow. And by the way Risa is now 3 years old, amazing how time flies so quick! She is now in pre-school, she love it so much and I am so happy that love her new world.

As for me, I don’t know what I’m going to do now. I have a couple hours to do things I want to do but I’m not sure if I could find a job which may not be easy to find a job for single mother like me. I may need to rush the ER when Risa get sick and take a few days off. So Like I said, it is not easy to find a job for single mother. read more

Rant 2012

Rant 2012

It’s been a year since my husband died. Many things changed and I have to say that being a single parent sucks. I hate being lonely. I miss so much. I need someone to talk to about my feelings. I need to vent and rant. I can’t rant on Facebook any longer due from getting negative responses from people about my negative statuses, which is not their damn business anyway.

I hate Facebook now, it died along with my husband. I have No happy status to post on Facebook anymore. Facebook used to be fun before Naoya died. Now all that I can feel now is that I envy all of my friends who are happily married and still complain about how their husband come home late everyday while I on the other hand waiting for nothing everyday. Sometimes I wish this is all just a nightmare and I’d wake up and see him by my side. God I miss so much that it hurts so bad. read more

New year’s around the corner

New year’s around the corner

Time flies so fast. Can’t believe new year’s around the corner and that means my 11th wedding anniversary and and week later is the day when my husband passed away.

Life without my husband was tough and hard. Not in a financial way *for now* but like people say, money can’t buy happiness. It can only RENT happiness.

Risa now is 1 year and 8 months old (1 year and 6 months adjusted). She’s growing and she’s turning into just like her mom lol. She amazes me every single moment. Apart from grieving, life with Risa is wonderful. It’s like a magic. There are words to describe it. read more

7 months

7 months

11-8-8-8:07: 7 months has passed.
And I’m still grieving and sadly none of the ppl I know truly understand how I feel. Wait there’s one because she’s also lost someone she love so much recently. But she told me that her lost is nothing compare to me.

I need to talk so someone, someone that experienced the same thing. Someone that also lost her spouse. May I say widow to widow talk?
Some say that I need get over it and face the reality. Believe me. I am trying so damn hard to face the truth the he’ll never ever going to come back. I’m still keeping my husband’s things, his favourite things. I want and need to show them to my daughter someday when she’s grow up. read more